SOL 31:It’s hard for me…

It’s hard for me to read the new article about the child who’s been abused.

It’s hard me to watch the infomercial about the sad overseas orphans.

It’s hard for me to understand parents who can’t take time check in with their child.

It’s hard for me to scroll through social media announcements of growing families.

It’s hard for me to hear the “were ready for more grandkids/nieces and nephews”

It’s hard for me to scroll Pinterest through all the nursery decor.

It’s hard for me to listen how bad your children behave.

It’s hard for me to pass that section of tiny clothes.

It’s hard for me to keep checking my temperature each morning.

It’s hard for me to answer “When are you guys going to star having kids?”

It’s hard for me to keep charting every morning.

It’s hard for me to not just break inside when told not to worry it will happen when it’s time.

It’s hard for me to keep smiling when I feel like just letting go the tears.

It’s hard for me to be able to give my husband the family we’ve dreamed and prayed for.

It’s hard for me to keep hopeful and paticent.

It’s hard for me to suppress the desire and longing to be a mother.

It’s hard for me.

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3 thoughts on “SOL 31:It’s hard for me…

  1. While I can’t make you any promises, I can say that I have felt those feelings. I know it is so hard and you are so brave to give voice to your feelings. I know there are no more tender feelings than the ones you’ve so beautifully expressed. I wish you peace and comfort.

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  2. I have been there- I had to endure a lot to get pregnant. 4 years of trying then 3 surgeries and doses and doses of medications got me there. 20 years later, I have 3 beautiful children. It is hard to be patient when you want motherhood so badly. (ages 20, 19 and 10) Prayers and positive thoughts to get you the family you dream about.

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